NOVEMBER 29, 1999: THE SANTA ELEVEN
MONDAY NIGHT. I ate a lonely dinner at Taco Time, two chicken soft tacos and tater tots. I walked up to Curtis's for the Santa Claus meeting. My vision for participating in this Santa Claus thing was that it would simply be an absurdist demonstration in the midst of the more serious demonstrations against the W.T.O. that were expected to take place. Curtis described our role to me when he asked if I wanted to be included, saying we would be Ambassadors Of Goodwill From The North Pole. When I walked into Curtis's place I saw that Katie was writing the evening's agenda in magic marker on a big piece of paper taped to the wall--Group Safety, Media Messages, Tactical Strategy, etc. I felt tired and grouchy for no real reason and just wanted to get my costume, find out where we were meeting, get some sleep, and throw myself into the fray the next morning. We all cracked bottles of beer open and discussed our various opinions about what we wanted to do the next day, which demonstration we wanted to take part in, where we wanted to meet, and what to do if there was "trouble." In the end, we decided to meet at seven the next morning at The Lux coffee shop in Belltown. We would then walk down to the Pike Place Market and join one of the marches that was starting there. The high point of the meeting came when it was suggested that we all try on our Santa Claus outfits. We put on our costumes and quickly fell into character, ho-ho hoing, laughing all the way--all that good cheer stuff that Santa Claus is known for. We took a few group shots with each of us striking a different pose. I raised my fist into the air in defiance and the camera flash went off.
My brother gave me a ride home. We agreed that he would pick me up at 6:45 the next morning. I looked up at my ex-girlfriend's window for a moment and wondered what she was up to. I wanted to open the door and find her at home the way it was when we lived together, but she was up there with her new guy and I had yet to find a way to explain the feelings I still had for her. I sighed and went into my apartment feeling not too excited about having to wake up so early. Why didn't we just agree to meet a little later in the morning? Why had I agreed to do this in the first place? I looked at my Santa suit laying on the floor, shook my head, and laughed. I got into bed, set the alarm for six fifteen, and turned off the light. It was raining outside, the kind of rain that made it feel good to be inside, warm and in bed. I fell asleep listening to the sound of the raindrops as they tapped hypnotically on the ground outside my window. It was a very peaceful sound, and though I was sad and alone I felt glad to be back in Seattle.